RECOGNIZING THE OBVIOUS EDITION

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Yo, yo, yo MacYippers!
This will be an extremely brief blog.
Classless, clueless Opie, not even making eye contact with Mark DeSantis, is of course, standard operating procedure for the arrogant little drunken womanizing frat boy from hell who somehow ended up being our mayor.

Yes, I remember how. And part of me still can't believe it.

But let me state the obvious.

Opie has blown off three meetings.

One with angry black people concerned over the new arena's impact in the Hill.
One with angry black people concerned with the new casino's impact on the North Side.
One with angry women who don't like cops who beat their wives.

Instead of being in the Hill, he was partying with millionaire Pens part owner Ron Burkle.

Instead of being on the North Side, he was at Fenway Park, taking in a Redsox game.

Instead of being at the Council Chambers, he was sucking up to sports figures at a celebrity golf tournament.

Gee, do you think maybe he doesn't like chicks and negroes?

Gee, do you think maybe in classic white guy frat boy sports obsessed Pittsburgh style, he'd much rather be partying or attending sporting events or schmoozing with former NFL quarterbacks?

Gee, do you think it's a coincidence that the meetings he's blown off involve women and African-Americans?

Have you heard of any white guys pissed off because he's blown off THEIR meeting?

No?

Hmmm.

Sometimes you just have to call a spade a spade, which I'm guessin' Opie might do privately on a regular basis.

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

Sometimes the truth is obvious.

Sometimes the fact that Pittsburghers don't recognize this, in spades if you will, is extremely aggravating.

It is what it is.

He is a sports obsessed, macho, fighting, partying frat boy.

And this is Pittsburgh.

Have a lovely weekend everyone!

Go Stillers.

YOU GO DAN RATHER EDITION

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Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! What up?
Will Dan Rather actually call President Bush... both President Bushes... as a witness in his lawsuit against CBS? Or did the reporter on this story extrapolate a bit too much from Rather's limited response when asked about it?


EXAMINER.COM:
Former "Evening News" Dan Rather choked back tears on several occasions today when discussing his decision to file a lawsuit against CBS and he left many audience members with a sense that he may call President George W. Bush as a witness should the lawsuit proceed to trial (and Rather said he hoped it would).

When asked by Carol Joynt, host of the "Q&A Café" held at Nathans restaurant who worked with Rather at CBS in the 1970s, whether "he'd like to" call President Bush as a witness in the trial, Rather said "I'd like not to answer the question," leaving both Joynt and audience members wondering whether the newsman has Bush in his sights." Joynt later told Yeas & Nays, "From the look in his eye -- and he gave me a definite Ratheresque look -- I got the impression he will call the president as a witness. Possibly both of them: 41 and 43. He implied the suit is not against them, but what the suit is about stems directly from his antagonistic relationship with them."

In the lawsuit, Rather claims he was unjustifiably squeezed out of CBS by network executives following a 2004 story about President Bush’s service record in the Texas Air National Guard. After evidence emerged that the story’s primary documents were possibly faked or forged, Rather stated on air that “if I knew then what I know now, I would not have gone ahead with the story as it was aired, and I certainly would not have used the documents in question.”


http://www.examiner.com/blogs/Yeas_and_Nays/2007/9/26/Rather-chokes-up-and-hunkers-down

MacYapper - Here's what pisses me off about the whole Rather thing. Everybody knows that, to some degree, Dapper Dan is a nut's nut. Ego out of control. That whole "I'm a reporter" schtick gets old. I remember when he was doing a Q and A somewhere and held a reporter's notebook in his hand the entire time and I thought, are you going to start interviewing somebody at the Q and A featuring you as the guy with the A's? It was gimmicky. And gimmickry posing as folksiness or "newsiness" is a Rather trademark. Or hallmark. Or some kind of mark.

But here's the thing. Rather did get it right. Bush did go out of his way to avoid national guard duty. His father did make a call that made a difference. The former Speaker of the Texas House (and former Texas Lt. Guv as well) has written a book detailing the preferential treatment Dubya got... treatment in which he played a direct and personal role. I've talked to him about it on the air. There's no mistaking what happened here. Here's one version from, of all things, CBS News.

CBSNEWS.COM:

A few months before Mr. Bush would become eligible for the draft, Barnes says he had a meeting with the late oilman Sid Adger, a friend to both Barnes and then-Congressman George Bush.

"It's been a long time ago, but he said basically would I help young George Bush get in the Air National Guard," says Barnes, who then contacted his longtime friend Gen. James Rose, the head of Texas' Air National Guard.

"I was a young, ambitious politician doing what I thought was acceptable," says Barnes. "It was important to make friends. And I recommended a lot of people for the National Guard during the Vietnam era - as Speaker of the House and as lt. governor."

George W. Bush was among those he recommended for the National Guard. Was this a case of preferential treatment?

"I would describe it as preferential treatment. There were hundreds of names on the list of people wanting to get into the Air National Guard or the Army National Guard," says Barnes. "I think that would have been a preference to anybody that didn't want to go to Vietnam or didn’t want to leave. We had a lot of young men that left and went to Canada in the '60s and fled this country. But those that could get in the Reserves, or those that could get in the National Guard - chances are they would not have to go to Vietnam."

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2004/09/08/60II/main641984.shtml

MacYapper - So if you were Dan Rather, and you got fired for screwing up a story on Dubya getting preferential treatment to keep him out of 'Nam, but the story you reported was actually correct, even if it turns out some of the documents may not have been genuine, wouldn't you still be infuriated?

Wouldn't you think that the important thing for the American people to know is that Dubya skated when he claims he didn't?

Unless of course you think the truth doesn't really matter any more. Which is tempting, but too depressing. At least for moi.

Or maybe this isn't something noble about Rather's good name. Maybe there's a technical contract violation, as Rather claims, and he wants his Imus money.

But it will always stick in my craw, and it's some kind of craw, that Rather had his facts straight even if his documentation turned out to be shaky. Because Dubya skating and lying to us about it all these years is the point. It is a point that seems lost on many if not most. Welcome to America.

DUDE, TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT TO COME TO SEE MAC-YAPPER COMEDY!

We appreciate all the venues we play. The Back Stage Bar is excellent. The Brillo Box is eclectic and cool. But the Improv is the premier place to see comedy in the city. The venue is designed for comedy, and that helps.

Tonight Susie Meister, of MTV Road Rules, will talk about her alcoholic father.
I will talk about my first marriage ending which, predictably, involved some naughty behavior on my part.
Gab Bonesso will talk about a little baby being sexually assaulted by a dog.
Gene Collier will talk about the strange custom in this country to require a license to fish but no license whatsoever to help choose the leader of the free world.

It's the Sex, Politics, and Religion Comedy show. $10 lousy bucks dude!
The Improv is at the Waterfront in Homestead.

www.improv.com

You gotta come. Gotta. Mandatory.

See yinz there.

THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE
Listen live at www.937thezone.com

Thursday's show will feature Vic Walzcak of the ACLU on why Larry Craig shouldn't be guilty of any crime.
We'll do that during the 3pm hour.

Email me at Zone website above or at johnmcintire@comcast.net

UPCOMING COMEDY SHOW INFO AND COMEDY AUDIO:
www.myspace.com/MacYapper

F ME? F YOU! EDITION

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Yo, yo, yo MacYippers! What up?

Are you frightened of the F word? So many people are frightened of words. I guess the N word is the scariest ever, but the F word also gets people in a tizzy.
It's like, what the fuck is wrong with these people.

Doh! I've done it. I've actually written the word on a blog. Oh, the repercussions. Oh, the fallout. Oh, the humanity.

I can't believe how immature people are. Sure, it's a distasteful word but it can't hurt you. Really, it can't hurt you. You will not be hurt by this word.

But they have to have something to talk about on college campuses.

ROCKY MOUNTAIN NEWS:
http://www.dailycamera.com/news/2007/sep/25/300-csu-urge-firing-editor-over-anti-bush-profanit/

FORT COLLINS — The student newspaper that stirred up a hornet's nest when it dropped the F-bomb last week drew more fire Monday.

It also sparked thoughtful debate.

College Republicans at Colorado State University collected more than 300 signatures calling on CSU's Board of Student Communications to fire Editor in Chief David McSwane.

"It was very unprofessional," College Republicans chairwoman Chelsey Penoyer said at a tent her group had set up next to the Lory Student Center.

"The nation is looking at us as a bunch of uneducated children. It reflects horribly on CSU."

But senior journalism major Rachael Martin defended the paper. "I agree that he didn't need to use the f-word," said Martin, who described herself as a Republican.

"But look at what it's done. It's had college students all around the nation talking about freedom of speech for the first time. By no means should he be fired."

What got it all started

On Friday, The Rocky Mountain Collegian ran a four-word editorial that read: "Taser this . . . F--- Bush." National radio talk shows, CNN and MSNBC have since buzzed with debate about free-speech rights and the bounds of propriety.

The profane editorial was a response to last week's Tasering of a University of Florida student who disrupted a forum with Sen. John Kerry.

MacYapper - So many idjits don't understand that freedom of speech means freedom of speech. Distasteful freedom of speech. Disagreeable freedom of speech. Low-rent freedom of speech. Speech with which you disagree freedom of speech.

Profanity laden freedom of speech.

Yes, those who want to criticize speech also have the same freedom. They can choose to call speech "inappropriate," or "unprofessional" or "over the top" all they want.
They just have to realize that it's protected and that their disagreeing with the message doesn't change the fact that it's protected.

This student journalistic outburst, if you wanna call it that, was triggered by a student jouranlists outrage over that student in Gainesville, Florida being tasered at the John Kerry speech.

That was total bullshit, and a disgrace to the country which supposedly values its 1st amendment.

Some callers to my show said the kid was "out of line." Again, misses the point.
It's legal to be out of line. At least it is in the case of the kid who demanded to know of Kerry why he conceded the election when there was evidence of massive voter fraud.

But the tut-tutters of the universe always have to have something to tut tut about.
One should not speak thusly of the President of the Yoo-nited States, out of respect.

Of course, it is arguably disrespectful to disingenuously get us into an unnecessary war, which has resulted in the deaths of hundreds of thousands of civilians, and thousands of American boys and girls.

But we don't want to talk about that. It's rude. Its downright disrespectful.

It might be perceived as over the top. Just eat your oatmeal and watch TV.
And shut the F up. And if you do talk, do not be overly contrarian, for the tut-tutters will have to find you and shush you. You disrespectful lout.

I HATE FOOTBALL COACHES




MacYapper - I hate many football coaches because they have a God complex. They believe reporters are ignorant inferior beings who shouldn't even be allowed in the same room with the noble gladiators and their bosses.

Johnny Mustache Ride Steigerwald said on my show that he understands why coaches hate reporters, because who wants to stare at a bunch of fat, worthless punks who couldn't possibly understand what it's like to achieve amazing athletic feats.

I on the other hand think a good reporter is a much more useful to a society than a good athlete. I know, call me crazy.

So I side with DAILY OKLAHOMAN columnist Jenni Carlson over OK State coach Mike Gundy who, as you'll see on the above You Tube, got way too personal with Carlson, saying he knew she didn't have children, but if she did, she'd understand what a horrible person she was for implying that QB Bobby Reid didn't have the right stuff and that's why the coach benched him.

Jenni was a bit over the top in suggesting that Reid was a momma's boy for being near the team bus and having his mom feed him chicken while he talked on the cell phone. Or maybe she wasn't.

But at a follow up news conference, Coach Gundy couldn't back up his claim that three quarters of the column was "fiction."
SPORTINGNEWS.COM:
http://www.sportingnews.com/yourturn/viewtopic.php?t=277308
On Saturday, Gundy called three-fourths of the column "fiction." During Gundy's news conference Monday, Carlson asked the coach to point out what he thought were factual errors.

"I don't have to," Gundy said.

Carlson asked again, and Gundy said, "I don't have to. I'd rather just let it go."

MacYapper - He picked on her 'cause she's a woman and he's an egomaniacal male chauvinist bastard. And because he's a football coach with a God complex.

And because he can shout down his players like a drill sgt., so he thinks this technique works with the rest of the world. It doesn't. You're not General Patton dude, you're just a football coach. Settle down.

Was Carlson tough on Reid? Yes, but as the Chicago Sun Times points out, not that tough.

SUNTIMES.COM:
http://www.suntimes.com/sports/slezak/572771,CST-SPT-carol25.article
How tough is too tough?
Make no mistake, Carlson was tough on Reid. For instance, to illustrate her belief that he's a coddled player, she wrote about seeing Reid's mom feed him chicken out of a boxed meal as he stood near the team's chartered buses after a recent loss. She also inferred that he wouldn't play through minor injuries, and indicated that he has an unusually acute case of game-day nerves. That's a lot to pile on a college kid.
Or is it? I've read many harsher pieces about college athletes. Division I athletes may not technically be professionals, but they're part of a pro-style product that the colleges themselves created. They are given free tuition and room and board. They're typically subjected to less rigorous academic standards than their peers. Many are considered celebrities on campus and in their communities. (Certainly most quarterbacks are.) Isn't it to be expected that intensified scrutiny will follow? Reid knew what he was getting into when he decided to play in the Big 12. He's 21 years old, no longer a kid. And when a Big 12 quarterback loses his job, it's news. Everyone is going to speculate as to the reasons why. Maybe Carlson hit too close to home?

MacYapper - A Zone caller speculated da coach is either doing the mother or the kid. Scurrilous. Out of bounds! Unfair I say! How dare he say that.
Fuck him.

GENERAL BETRAY-US

Yes, whoever gave Moveon.org a price break at the NYT shouldn't have done it.
But as NYT columnist Frank Rich said on my radio show today, there's a war on. Let's keep our eyes on the ball folks.
FOX News has already turned it into freaking Watergate.

IRANIAN PRESIDENT DECLARES NO HOMOS IN IRAN

After this startling declaration during the speech at Columbia University yesterday, we tracked down an Iranian radio show which speaks the truth about this allegation.
Click below:

http://www.937thezone.com/play_window.php?audioType=Episode&audioId=1026236

For the latest scintillating commentary and details on Sweetie the Sweet Tasting Vodka for Kids, click on
www.937thezone.com

THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE

Lisen live at above Zone website!

On Wednesday's show:
1pm Hour Comedian and MTV Road Rules Hottie Susie Meister, "the Susie-Meister!"

2pm Hour Pirates play by play man Greg Brown Everybody! on wonding up another hapless season.
Musician J.G. Bocella, who rails against racism, on the Jena 6 mess.

3pm Hour City Paper Editor Chris Potter on Dickie Cougar MellonScaife's messy divorce and the battle between the PG and the Trib.

WEDNESDAY NIGHT COMEDY!!!! IT'S 93.7 THE ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV!!!

Dig the "comedy stylings" (do they still have those?) of MacYapper, Gab Bonesso, Gene Collier, and Susie Meister at the Improv. Wednesday at 8pm.

Tickets a lousy $10. It's the Sex, Politics, and Religion Comedy Show.

www.improv.com

We'll give away more tickets on the Wednesday show!

ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!

email me at Zone website above or at johnmcintire@comcast.net

UPCOMING COMEDY SHOWS AND COMEDY AUDIO AT:
www.myspace.com/MacYapper

DICKIE COUGAR MELLON-SCAIFE EDITION

Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! Don't you just love the pissing contest between Dickie Cougar MellonScaife and the Block family? Or is it MellonScaife vs. PG Editor David Shribman? Or is it MellonScaife vs. PG Reporter Dennis Roddy?

Roddy has been telling folks for years that Scaife is pulling a ridiculous amount of money out of his personal fortune and putting it into the losing (at least financially) proposition that is the Pittsburgh Tribune Review.

Now we learn that he may be pulling money out of his trust fund to the tune of $20 million freaking dollars a year!

What's the most hysterical part? The most hysterical part is that the soon to be former Mrs. Scaife, Ritchie Scaife, classifies the Tribune Review, the Pittsburgh edition, not as a business venture, but as a hobby.

What's the logic there? Because if it had been a business venture in the strictest sense of the term, Scaife would have abandoned it long ago, because it doesn't make any freaking money! In fact it hemmorages millions each year.

Frankly, Ritchie's logic makes a lot of sense. How obsessed does Dickie have to be with cutting into the Block's action? How obsessed does Dickie have to be with running his own urban newspaper? How obsessed does Dickie have to be to continue to have a vehicle to spread his right-wing bile, his so called "investigative" journalism? How obsessed? So obsessed that he's willing to drain a major trust fund and lose millions each year.

Now that is obsessed! Obsessive compulsive? No... obsessive ridiculous.

Now mind you, I think the Trib has many great employees, including some excellent reporters, columnists, and even some among the editorial staff.

But I have this never ending grudge against Dickie for funding the investigation to dig up dirt on the Clintons (Arkansas project) which led to impeachment which led to the biggest waste of time and money this government has ever seen.

Unless you count the Iraq war.
And maybe Vietnam.

Still, it's up there.

Now this whole thing is interesting. First Judge Hertzberg orders the records sealed? Why? Oh, there was some lame rationale but obviously it's because Dickie Cougar is loaded and powerful.

Then some jagoff puts the records on line. That's how Dennis Roddy learns about all this cool shit. Then Roddy writes it up. Now they've been taken off line.

How did they get on line in the first place? It's a conspiracy worthy of a Dennis Roddy story. It's a conspiracy worthy of a Dickie Cougar MellonScaife conspiracy.

Did someone at the prothonotary's office, or whoever leaked this, have it in for Dickie? Were they a friend of Roddy's? Was it just the luckiest damn coincidence ever? How did Dennis know it was a good time to check the public records on line for some records which had been ordered sealed and never should have appeared on line?

Is Dennis that diligent that he just willy nilly checks up on various on line government public record sites just for the hell of it?

PITTSBURGH POST-GAZETTE:
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/07266/819835-85.stm

"Mr. Scaife has asked the court to do something unprecedented: stop a newspaper from writing about documents that were publicly available and highly newsworthy," said David M. Shribman, executive editor of the Post-Gazette.

"That effort is newsworthy in and of itself. As we will advise the court, such a prior restraint would be a clear violation of the First Amendment and of press prerogatives and freedoms that all newspapers cherish. In the meantime, we have posted the most significant of those documents on our Web site and will continue to evaluate whether additional postings should be made."

MacYapper - Now I'm totally with the Shrib-Man on this point. I loves me some free speech. I loves me some public records.

And there is of course the blatant hypocrisy since Scaife tried to unseal the John Heinz - Theresa Heinz-Kerry divorce records to get his hands on some fresh presidential candidate dirt during the last presidential campaign cycle.

But though Shribman is of course correct that they were publicly available, is there any merit to the argument that if a judge seals them, and they accidentally, temporarily become public record... that a newspaper should know better since the newspaper knows that they were in fact ordered sealed. And since the judge didn't issue new orders, did they knowingly publish something they knew was "classified," if you will.

Now these may be newsworthy documents, but it ain't the freaking Pentagon Papers for chrissakes.

However, I'm sure the PG has it some good-ass lawyers who wouldn't allow them to publish if they didn't have some good-ass arguments.

BTW, how cool is it that the soon to be ex is Margaret Ritchie "Battle" Scaife?

No wonder she shows up unannounced to try to kidnap her dog back. She sin't playin'. She apparently hired a private Dick to uncover Dickie Cougar's alleged affair.

Wanna expose a public Dick? Gotta hire a private one.

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PITTSBURGH IMPROV WEDNESDAY NIGHT BABY!

Ladies and Germs we've damn near perfected the Sex, Politics, and Religion comedy show! John McIntire, Gab Bonesso, Gene Collier and, from MTV Road Rules and WQED, the lovely and talented Susie Meister! The Susie-Meister.

8pm. $10.

Everybody who's anybody will be there. Of course, in a town full of nobody's it could be a small crowd.

But yinz should stop ott.

www.improv.com

THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE
Listen Live at www.937thezone.com
UPDATED COMEDY BITS ALSO ON ZONE WEBSITE

Tuesday 9/25

1PM HOUR Pussy Cat Specter Post Gazette advice Columnist

3pm HOUR New York Times Columnist Frank Rich
Trib Review Smart Allecky Sports Punk Rob Rossi

Wed 9/26

1PM HOUR Comedian, from MTV Road Rules, Susie Meister

2pm HOUR - Jena Six commentary from musician fighting racism J.G. Bocella.

MORE INFO ON UPCOMING COMEDY SHOWS AND Comedy Audio at
www.myspace.com/MacYapper

ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!
Email me a Zone website above or at johnmcintire@comcast.net

THERE GOES THE NEIGHBORHOOD EDITION

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Yo, yo, yo MacYippers! What up?
I'm back on the boob tube. Actually, there ain't no boobs here. It's a classy operation. It's WQED. You know, the fancy schmancy public TV station? They've got all that classy programming? All artsy, fartsy, n'at? That's where they did the Mr. Rogers show! Mr. Freaking Rogers! Classy Assy Artsy Fartsy. I mean top drawer, dude. And I get to be on a show shot in the same freakin' building n'at.

I'll be on the Off Q show once a week starting in early October. That's the round table chat show hosted by Chris Moore, broadcast veteran, Vietnam veteran, and snazzy-ass dresser.

He keeps the damn thing moving along. It's one of those panel shows and we kick around the newsy stuff for half an hour.

They used to have guest panelists, but now there will just be four regular panelists, unless one of us is sick, on vacation. or QED shit-cans one of our asses.

Who are the other asses you might ax? Well Ass Number One, at least in MacYapper's book, is the cranky cantankerous conservative curmudgeon Mean Bill Green, whom I tortured for years on the NightTalk show way back in the late 70's, and whom I hope to torture in excruciating fashion on the new vehicle, although I'll have to be somewhat polite because it's their candy store and they run a classy operation, which is why it is inexplicable that they've hired moi.

They've also got two classy dames returning for another run. One would be Heather Heidelbaugh, who incidentally is the exclusive legal anal-ist for the John McIntire show on 93.7 The Zone one to four every freakin' afternoon.

Heather is one of those big shot lawyers for a big shot dahntahn law firm. She handles the civil end of things. She's one of those delightful right wing nutbags (think Ann Coulter only charming) willing to put up with the views of others with whom she disagrees. And she's a MILF.

Now I don't even know if the other panelist has kids or I'd call her a MILF. But she's hot. The lovely and talented Valerie McDonald, former Pittsburgh City Council Chick, who moved on to Recorder of Deeds for Allegheny County, will be in the house. Valerie continues to dismiss my recommendation for her orafice slogan "Dirty Deeds, Done Dirt Cheap."

Maybe that's why they're phasing her orafice out of existence. I don't know what she'll do next. She ran for Lt. Guv once, but then she found out Pennsylvanians prefer a vegetable. But I'm damn glad she'll be on the right side of the issues along with yours truly, as we do battle with the two evil folk.

I'd have to say Mean Bill Green is the lesser of two evils. Or is that the evil of two lessers? No, Heather isn't a lesser. Anyway, here's hoping I can stick in Billy G's craw. I just hope he doesn't enjoy it. Then I'll have to completely reevaluate our schtick.

Thanks to OFF Q AND ON Q E.P. Jocelyn Hough for getting me this gig. Thanks to G.M. George Miles for putting behind us that lame-ass George Miles imitation I did at the "Off The Record" spoof of WQED a few years ago. Thanks to Mr. McFeely for letting me come into his neighborhood.

I'd like to thank the little people. But then a lot of midgets stink.


UPCOMING COMEDY BABY, YEAH!

THE BACKSTAGE BAR, NEXT TO THE O'REILLY THEATER SATURDAY SEPTEMBER 22ND 9:30 PM

OK, this is kinda cool. Gene Collier co-wrote "The Chief," the play about Art Rooney Sr. That play will be running beginning this coming Tuesday at the O'Reilly Theater. It'll also still be underway on Saturday the 22nd. That's when Collier will join Gab Bonesso and myself at the BackStage Bar. Free comedy. 9:30 at night.
Catch The Chief early, and then come by and schmooze with co-author Gene.


http://www.pgharts.org/venues/backstagebar.aspx


THE SEX, POLITICS AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW - ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - 8PM - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH
www.improv.com

Gab, Gene and I will be focusing in these typically taboo topics, with hopefully much less alliteration. It'll be way cool. Be there and be square.
Also a late edition, SUSIE MEISTER OF MTV ROAD RULES! ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV BABY, YEAH!
THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE
Listen Live at www.937thezone.com

email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net or at zone website above

LEAVE VANESSA ALONE EDITION

GOTTA LOVE THOSE MAC-YAPPER SPONSORS!
http://www.izzazu.com/store/index.php


When I first heard about High School Musical star Vanessa Hudgens nude photo, my journalistic curiosity forced me to look it up on the internet. That picture is down below. I didn't want to scare you right away.

It's just a typical nude photo that kids take of themselves. I knew kids with nude polaroids back in the day. I had a polaroid back in the day. Come to think of it, I still do.

Anyway, then when I heard about Vanessa's alleged "lesbian" photos, once again my serious journalistic curiosity got the better of me, and I combed the internet with afine tooth comb... now there's a mixed metaphor... or something... and I found them. And they were nothing. This whole thing is much ado about nothing. Or as Mayor Opie would say, much "to-do" about nothing.

Who cares? Will you just let kids have some innocent fun? The picture at the top of the blog is the one of her so called "lesbian" turn. It's kids being silly, period.
Faux lesbianism is all the rage. That's what the kids are doing. Get used to it.

Here are some other not so shocking photos uncovered by your intrepid MacYapper.



The hype on the above photo was "her mouth was near her friend's breast." Not really that freaking exciting is it. Just more kids screwing around isn't it. This kid shouldn't lose her contract or her position in life, whatever the hell that is, because she and some friends did silly shit in front of a camera. Could we just lighten up people?

Now here is somewhat of a suggestive pose. But who gives a shit?


And here, my faithful MacYippers, is the money shot. Again I say, who cares?



Now here's an interesting Q and A piece about this so-called controversy:

BUDDYTV.COM:

http://www.buddytv.com/articles/high-school-musical/high-school-musical-vanessa-hu-10629.aspx

Should anybody care about Vanessa Hudgens' nude picture?

Yes, but only if you're a teenage boy with an Internet connection. I can't imagine how happy this picture made a nation of teenage male High School Musical fans. Besides that, though, it's not a situation that anyone should be upset over, let alone outraged. As some of our commentors pointed out last week, America has an incredibly conservative approach to nudity. If this happened anywhere in Europe (and it does all the time) no one would bat an eye. Because it happened here, however, parents are upset, TV viewers assume that Hudgens will be fired from High School Musical 3, and defenders of Hudgens' purity are devastated. Give everyone a couple of weeks and it will all be a non-issue.


Should Hudgens' publicist have admitted that the picture was indeed of Vanessa?

The other day, a friend of mine said that it was insanely stupid for Hudgens' publicist to almost immediately admit that the nude picture was actually of her. Prior to the publicist's announcement there was overwhelming skepticism as to whether the picture was actually of the High School Musical star. The theory is that had the publicist denied the validity of the picture, no one would ever be able to confirm whether it was Vanessa in the picture. What people are overlooking is that this would not have been a good thing. Had they denied that it was Hudgens, speculation would have continued for weeks, maybe months. Hudgens would be accused of covering her tracks, of being ashamed, and debate would rage online. With admitting the picture is real, Hudgens gets a ton of free publicity. Also, and this can't be overlooked, it's not like she looks bad in the picture. It's as innocent as a private nude picture can be and it certainly has galvanized her male fan base. Mostly, admitting the truth will allow the story to quickly go away, if only because there's nothing more to be said on it. The case is closed.


MacYapper - Yes I've heard someone has accused her of not paying legal bills. I don't give a shit about that either. The buddytv columnist makes excellent points about what a bunch of puritanical prudes we are here. Let's get over it.


UPCOMING COMEDY BABY, YEAH!

THE BACKSTAGE BAR, NEXT TO THE O'REILLY THEATER SATURDAY SEPTEMBER 22ND 9:30 PM

OK, this is kinda cool. Gene Collier co-wrote "The Chief," the play about Art Rooney Sr. That play will be running beginning this coming Tuesday at the O'Reilly Theater. It'll also still be underway on Saturday the 22nd. That's when Collier will join Gab Bonesso and myself at the BackStage Bar. Free comedy. 9:30 at night.
Catch The Chief early, and then come by and schmooze with co-author Gene.
http://www.pgharts.org/venues/backstagebar.aspx


THE SEX, POLITICS AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW - ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - 8PM - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH
www.improv.com

Gab, Gene and I will be focusing in these typically taboo topics, with hopefully much less alliteration. It'll be way cool. Be there and be square.
Also a late edition, SUSIE MEISTER OF MTV ROAD RULES! ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROVE BABY, YEAH!
THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE
Listen Live at www.937thezone.com

email me at above zone website or johnmcintire@comcast.net

ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!

WATCH OUT FER THEM FEREIGNERS EDITION

GOTTA LOVE THOSE MAC-YAPPER SPONSORS!
http://www.izzazu.com/store/index.php


Yo, yo, yo MacYippers! It's an exciting race on the North Side of the 'Burgh to see who will capture the city council seat which now belongs to infamous political yinzer Darlene Harris, she of the inept school board fame, and Dave Schuilenburg, upstart Canadian who came to Pittsburgh to run for stuff. Like the North Side city council seat.

OK, I don't really know if it's exciting. But I'm bored so I'm declaring it thus.

Dave tried to get the Dem. nomination and failed miserably, in the infamous Opie kills Mr. Peduto-head shellacking.

Now he's running as an "independent Democrat," which you might think is misleading, since he'll be on the ballot as an "independent." Whatever.
Marketing, marketing marketing.

Anyway, you'd think Darlene has this one in the bag. She's got the machine behind her. She's got years of yinzering it up with fellow yinzers, political and otherwise. She's got the lazy and apathetic electorate which doesn't like to investigate things very much on her side. She should be cruisin.'

But there is one possible sign that Darlene may hear the pitter patter of little Davey's feet. Either she hears footsteps, or she just wants to cream Dave to nobody will mess with Her Yinzerness in the future.

Here's the story. Dave is a 9/11 operator. He used to work for the city. The city has merged some functions with the county. Now Dave is still a 911 operator, who works for the county.

Darlene reportedly went in to Dave's boss and tried to get him fired. Why? Well presumably so he would look like an unemployed bum and have even less credibility, since the Canadian has a tough time establishing credible yinzer credentials.

Darlene is said to have demanded to know, of Dave's county boss, whether one can hire an alien, a foreigner, a Canook, somebody not from these parts, as a 911 dispatcher.

This story is confirmed, or at least he vouches for it, by Dave his own self.

Darlene's alleged motive was to have Dave removed. Turns out there are some pretty strict regulations regarding who can and who cannot be hired as a 911 dispatcher, but you can actually hire a foreigner if he has a green card.

Not only that, Dave will soon be an actual confirmed 100% bona fide grade A U.S. freaking citizen. Acoording to Dave, that becomes official November 6th.

But the fact of the matter is, if you have a green card, if you are a LEGAL ALIEN, you can be hired as a 911 operator.

So old fashioned yinzer infighting is still a hallmark of Pittsburgh politics.

I don't know whether Dave has a chance on the North Side, where I live.
But I do know getting somebody fired is a big deal... even trying to.

What a worthless wench.

UPCOMING COMEDY BABY, YEAH!

THE BACKSTAGE BAR, NEXT TO THE O'REILLY THEATER SATURDAY SEPTEMBER 22ND 9:30 PM

OK, this is kinda cool. Gene Collier co-wrote "The Chief," the play about Art Rooney Sr. That play will be running beginning this coming Tuesday at the O'Reilly Theater. It'll also still be underway on Saturday the 22nd. That's when Collier will join Gab Bonesso and myself at the BackStage Bar. Free comedy. 9:30 at night.
Catch The Chief early, and then come by and schmooze with co-author Gene.
http://www.pgharts.org/venues/backstagebar.aspx


THE SEX, POLITICS AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW - ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - 8PM - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH
www.improv.com

Gab, Gene and I will be focusing in these typically taboo topics, with hopefully much less alliteration. It'll be way cool. Be there and be square.

THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE
Listen Live at www.937thezone.com

Very sorry to report "The Gab" is ill today. Quite ill. Like barfing up a storm ill.
Her pop culture segments will be ably filled by the PG's Pussy Cat Specter and MTV's Susie Meister.
Get well soon Gabrielle!

1pm hour More on OJ - Brian O'Neill on Buccos new GM. Worthless or welcome?

2PM HOUR The City Paper's Charlie Dietch on the scandalous divorce case involving Trib Publisher Dickie Courgar MellonScaife
P.G. Advice Columnist Pussy Cat Specter

3pm Tony Norman on OJ
Sonni Abbata on new Fox Show about local TV News "Back To You"
Pop Culture report from Susie Meister of MTV Road Rules


MacYapper - For the latest updated Zone comedy bits (yes we're actually putting fresh ones on the Zone website now) check out www.937thezone.com

For more info on comedy shows and some comedy audio as well check out:
www.myspace.com/MacYapper

ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!

email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net or at Zone website above!

BIGGEST IDIOT EVER EDITION

GOTTA LOVE THOSE MAC-YAPPER SPONSORS!
http://www.izzazu.com/store/index.php


Yes, the smiling mug belongs to O.J.
Yes the smiling mug is actually in a mug-shot.
Yes he's under arrest...again.

The associated press has this caption underneath the mug shot:

ASSOCIATED PRESS:
This is a booking photo provided by the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department of O.J. Simpson. Police arrested O.J. Simpson on Sunday, September 16, 2007, saying he was part of an armed group who burst into a Las Vegas hotel room and snatched memorabilia that documented his own sports career, long ago eclipsed by scandal. (AP Photo/Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Dept.)

MacYapper - Do you freaking believe it? If you ever get away with anything of any significance, you use the metaphorical "getting away with murder" line.

Here's a guy who actually got away with murder. But it's so much more ridiculously unbelievable. Because most people who get away with murder are probably never exposed. Here's a guy who EVERYBODY knows is guilty. And he knows he's guilty. And he knows that everybody knows he's guilty. And he knows that they know that he knows he's guilty. And so on.

So he gets to cruise around the country, playing golf, still being somewhat of a celebrity (sad commentary on America's celeb obsessed culture), smiling and smirking because he got away with murder, and there's nothing you or anyone else on the planet can do about it.

So he's home free. He's in the clear. He's able to live out the rest of his life relatively comfortably, with that cat killed the canary grin, while Nicole and Ron's body are maggot food.

You'd think this would be enough. But no. No, apparently, instead of thanking God or Satan or Dead Johnny Cochran, or whoever got him off, and being smart enough to dodge any future bullets, metaphorical bullets, HIS GIANT O.J. EGO GOT THE BETTER OF HIM AGAIN!

He's in jail. And this time they got him. I was certain this was a misunderstanding and some Vegas cop with Barney Fife disease was blowing this out of proportion. But there is actual audio of the encounter. And you can here the Juice. And he's pissed. I'll play the audio today during the 1pm hour. More about that in the AP version of this unbelievable unfolding story.

ASSOCIATED PRESS:
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5i6bFmWZiDbFqsCuIHClBJxdLLvJg

An apparent audiotape of O.J. Simpson's standoff with men he accused of stealing his memorabilia begins with the ex-NFL star demanding, "Don't let nobody out this room. ... Think you can steal my (expletive) and sell it?"

Simpson was arrested Sunday and booked at a county jail on charges connected with what police described as a robbery at a Las Vegas hotel. A judge ordered Simpson be held without bail, Sgt. John Loretto said. A court date was set for Thursday.

In an audiotape released Monday by the celebrity news Web site TMZ.com, Simpson is heard shouting questions while other men shout orders to the men in the room.

TMZ said the recording was made on a handheld recorder belonging to Thomas Riccio, co-owner of the auction house Universal Rarities. Riccio did not immediately return a call for comment Monday.

MacYapper - Here's the audio of the confrontation from TMZ.COM:
http://www.tmz.com/tmz_main_video?titleid=1184669299

So there, you heard it. That's OJ. He's pissed.

Now this of course raises the question, is he the biggest fuck-up ever? Bigger than Dubya? Bigger than Bill for porking Monica? (Is that redundant?) Bigger than whoever fired Bob Prince? Bigger than name the person you know who's the biggest fuck-up ever?

How can you get away with murder and then go to jail on a crummy rap about your former memorobilia? You want it back? Hire some idiots to go steal it back. Why the hell would you show up yourself?

IT'S CALLED ENORMOUS OUT OF CONTROL NARCISSISTIC AMAZINGLY LARGE EGO FROM HELL DISEASE!

I guess they didn't get Al Capone for murder either, they got him on tax evasion.

But what a freaking moron. Pulls off the perfect crime... well not the perfect crime but he got away with it... and than screws himself with a penney ante piece of bullshit. Moron. Idjit. Not to mention murderer.

It's a crazy world, no?


IDIOTIC LAWMAKERS STILL HASHING OUT SMOKING BILL
When I say idiotic lawmakers, I mean the evil ones who are still trying to create exemptions to the Ban Smoking in PA bill which has been laying dormant since the lazy cocksuckers (not that there's anything wrong with that) adjourned early this summer.

Now they're back. The House bill has fewer exemptions than the Senate bill. The one thing that really pisses me off is that casinos just may get exemptions.

Ace reporter for the PG Gary Rotstein did a nice piece on this:
POST-GAZETTE.COM:
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/07259/817993-85.stm
Illinois has a complete smoking ban taking effect Jan. 1, despite claims from the state casino association that a majority of gambling patrons use tobacco and that a 20 percent drop in gaming revenue will result.

Colorado passed a smoking ban in 2006 with exemptions for casinos, but altered the law this year to include them. It takes effect Jan. 1. Nevada casinos, meanwhile, won exclusions from new curbs placed on other workplaces in a citizen referendum.

Atlantic City casinos have been operating since April under a city requirement restricting smokers to no more than 25 percent of the gaming floor.

Casinos were exempted from a previously approved state law there, but the New Jersey Legislature has been debating whether to rescind that. Casino workers in Atlantic City have organized to lobby for tough restrictions, saying they're the ones most harmed by secondhand smoke.


MacYapper - Cigarette smoke is poison gas. If you want to breathe it in, fine. I don't. Go smokeless. Even though you can get mouth cancer, you can't give it to me, unless I start frenching you, and that's unlikely. I mean, you know, depends on what you look like.

Bill Godshall of SMOKEFREEPA acknowledges that smokeless is bad but says his reserch has determined it's 90% less deadly than smoking toboacco. 90% LESS DEADLY!

So please, feel free to kill yourself, but don't kill the rest of us.

We'll talk to Bill during the one pm hour today.

THE BACKSTAGE BAR, NEXT TO THE O'REILLY THEATER SATURDAY SEPTEMBER 22ND 9:30 PM

OK, this is kinda cool. Gene Collier co-wrote "The Chief," the play about Art Rooney Sr. That play will be running beginning this coming Tuesday at the O'Reilly Theater. It'll also still be underway on Saturday the 22nd. That's when Collier will join Gab Bonesso and myself at the BackStage Bar. Free comedy. 9:30 at night.
Catch The Chief early, and then come by and schmooze with co-author Gene.
http://www.pgharts.org/venues/backstagebar.aspx


THE SEX, POLITICS AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW - ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - 8PM - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH
www.improv.com

Gab, Gene and I will be focusing in these typically taboo topics, with hopefully much less alliteration. It'll be way cool. Be there and be square.

THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE
Listen Live at www.937thezone.com

1pm hour OJ and Smoke Free PA

2pm hour NY Times columnist Frank Rich, author of The Greatest Story Ever Sold,
the story of how we swallowed the bullshit leading up to the Iraq war.

3pm hour Rob Owen PG TV critic... Is TV Getting worse?

Also Johnny "Mustache Ride" Steigerwald on our beloved Stillers

Gab will pop in with Pop Culture updates.

MacYapper - For the latest updated Zone comedy bits (yes we're actually putting fresh ones on the Zone website now) check out www.937thezone.com

For more info on comedy shows and some comedy audio as well check out:
www.myspace.com/MacYapper

ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!

email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net or at Zone website above!

BELICHICK PLEASE! EDITION

GOTTA LOVE THOSE MAC-YAPPER SPONSORS!
http://www.izzazu.com/store/index.php


The Hands Across The Burgosphere phenemonon is taking off. It's where we bloggers guilt trip you blogees into giving money for a really good cause. Like, say Pittsburgh Action Against Rape. Put up some cash will ya? So I can feel like my existence on the planet isn't totally useless. Click below won't yinz?
http://www.firstgiving.com/theburgher


Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers!

Am I the only one haunted by automated directory assistance? Who came up with this concept? I don't mean to get all Seinfeldian on your butt, but "what's the deal with automated directory assistance?"

The automated voice can NEVER EVER EVER understand what you're saying.

AUTO:"City and State please?"
ME: "Pittsburgh Pennsylvania"

AUTO: "I'M SORRY, COULD YOU REPEAT THAT?"

What the hell else sounds like Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania to this stupid fucking machine? Maybe about one or two of the 100 times I've called automated directory assistance has it actually worked without me having to talk to a real live human.

Why am I bitching about mundane annoyances when the world is falling apart?

Why not.

Hey, everybody's really tearing Bill Belichick a new asshole. Can you tear an asshole an asshole? Apparently you can. Turns out he's a cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater. And now he'll be eating shit. Turns out Mr. Genius isn't really that much of a braniac. Turns out he's just smart enough to steal defensive signals.

Johnny "Mustache Ride" Steigerwald has explained to me that Belichick's alleged sending a photographer to videotape Defensive signals as they're being sent into the game isn't so much about the game being played, but the next game, when they've studied the tape and figured out what the signals mean.

And it does make it rather suspicious that, after the wonderful shellacking the Stillers gave the Pats a couple of years ago, they freaking killed the Black and Gold in the playoffs.

CBS.SPORTSLINE.COM:
http://cbs.sportsline.com/columns/story/10349634
Bill Belichick -- his career, his legacy -- is in trouble if the reports are true. And that's the nicest word I can think to use right now to describe this situation: if.

That tiny little word -- if -- trumps the other words that come to mind. Words like "diabolical" and "cheater." Words like "performance" and "enhancement." Words like "Super Bowl" and "asterisk."

MacYapper - Is there anyone left in sports who doesn't cheat? And if everyone cheats, does this scandal matter?
I mean it matters to me because I have a three hour talk radio show to fill every day and this is pure gold. And it matters to me because I enjoy the number one American sport... building people up into heroes so we can rip them to shreds later.

Belechick is the new Britney. Wonder if he'll start exposing his hoo-ha?

CBS.SPORTSLINE.COM:
If the reports are true, it taints everything Belichick and his New England Patriots have achieved since 2001, including three Super Bowl championships in four years. All three of those Super Bowl rings are tarnished -- if the reports are true.

The reports are damning, and the fact that Belichick on Wednesday offered a vague, Jason Giambi-like apology "to everyone who has been affected" -- without actually admitting to anything -- makes him look guilty of something.

Guilty of what? Well, the reports say the Patriots illegally used a video camera to study the New York Jets' sideline on Sunday and steal the Jets' signs. The Patriots traveled to East Rutherford, N.J., and made winning on the road look easy 38-14.

MacYapper - Commissioner Goodell is on the hot seat now dude. Will he suspend Belichick at all? For how many games? He claims to be the new sheriff in town, but I'm guessin' he'll wimp out on this one. One game suspension. That'll be it.

But this scandal has really taken off. This guy's being compared to everyone from Micahel Vick to Barry Bonds to Adolph Hitler. OK, the Hitler thing is premature, but wait for it.

CBS.SPORTSLINE.COM:
But the reports are even more damning than that. They suggest that this problem goes deeper than Sunday's game. They suggest that the Patriots have stolen signs from several opponents dating to last season, including from Green Bay in a 35-0 blowout win. Minutes after that game, Green Bay cornerback Al Harris told the Boston Herald:

"It's almost like they knew what we were doing, you know?" Harris said on Nov. 19. "You have to tip your hat to them. They ran plays designed for us. They ran plays that made us check out of some things. I don't know who calls their plays, but Belichick is pretty good. Honestly, he's pretty good."

Chilling words. All of this makes you wonder how far back this scandal -- if it's true -- might go. Might it go all the way back to 2001? Might it include any playoff games? Might it include a Super Bowl? Or two? Or three?

If this is true, Bill Belichick is the NFL's version of Barry Bonds.

MacYapper - The talk radio police are already getting a rope. We'll see if Sheriff Roger has the balls to hang him.

COMEDY, DUDE:

Thanks to everyone who came out to the Brillo Box to catch the 9/11 jokes. No sir, nothing funnier.

Your next opportunity for comedy?

THE BACKSTAGE BAR, NEXT TO THE O'REILLY THEATER SATURDAY SEPTEMBER 22ND 9:30 PM

OK, this is kinda cool. Gene Collier co-wrote "The Chief," the play about Art Rooney Sr. That play will be running beginning this coming Tuesday at the O'Reilly Theater. It'll also still be underway on Saturday the 22nd. That's when Collier will join Gab Bonesso and myself at the BackStage Bar. Free comedy. 9:30 at night.
Catch The Chief early, and then come by and schmooze with co-author Gene.
http://www.pgharts.org/venues/backstagebar.aspx


THE SEX, POLITICS AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW - ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - 8PM - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH
www.improv.com

Gab, Gene and I will be focusing in these typically taboo topcs, with hopefully much less alliteration. It'll be way cool. Be there and be square.

THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE
Listen Live at www.937thezone.com

On Friday in the 1pm hour we'll talk with Alby Oxenreiter about his new book "Sports Memories of Western PA"... also Lesbian Correspondent Sue Kerr on the fallout from the Larry The Toe Tapper Craig... all that during the 1pm hour!

During the 3pm hour, check out the Imrov comic of the week, Tammy Pescatelli... a nice Jewish girl.

TAMMY'S BIO:
Growing up with all brothers will give a Sicilian girl from Cleveland two things: a great sense of security and an even greater sense of humor (not to mention an unusually high tolerance for toilet seats left in the “up” position). Indeed, actress/comedienne Tammy Pescatelli got her fair share of all three, but her sense of humor is what has made her one of America’s funniest – and hardest working – women of comedy. Tammy was one of the top finalists on the highly rated NBC reality show, “Last Comic Standing,” beating out thousands for the enviable spot. Tammy appeared recently as a guest on, “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno,” and has been a featured comic on, “An Evening at the Improv,” National Lampoon’s‚ “Funny Money,” and most recently on Comedy Central’s “The World Stands Up.” Almost always on the road, Tammy has performed throughout North America and has spent time entertaining troops in Iraq as well. Tammy is a three-time Addie Award winner, a two-time Cleo nominee and a first-place winner of the “Bud Light Ladies of Laffter” competition.

MacYapper - For the latest updated Zone comedy bits (yes we're actually putting fresh ones on the Zone website now) check out www.937thezone.com

For more info on comedy shows and some comedy audio as well check out:
www.myspace.com/MacYapper

ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!

email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net or at Zone website above!

WE'LL NEVER BE THE SAME EDITION

GOTTA LOVE THOSE MAC-YAPPER SPONSORS!
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The Hands Across The Burgosphere phenemonon is taking off. It's where we bloggers guilt trip you blogees into giving money for a really good cause. Like, say Pittsburgh Action Against Rape. Put up some cash will ya? So I can feel like my existence on the planet isn't totally useless. Click below won't yinz?
http://www.firstgiving.com/theburgher

Yo, yo, yo MacYippers! Happy 9/11!
Osama-claus will come down your chimney and leave you a ticking present.

So remember all that bullshit about how "we'll never be the same" after 9/11?
Of course we're exactly the same. The world is a dangerous place but we don't care about it unless the danger is right in front of us. We still run up our credit cards, we still watch vapid TV, we still eat like pregnant hogs, we still masturbate profusely. Or maybe that's just me.

But clearly we're the same shallow maroons we were in 2000.

This morning I'm at my house getting ready to go to work and I hear "this is an abc news special report," and I'm thinkin,' oh shit, here we go, time to fly out the door and be prepared to ad lib endlessly while news of the latest attack trickles in, and take endless angry phone calls from Muslim hating muttonheads.

But no... it was just Diane and Robin introducing brief live coverage of a ceremony in D.C. with Dubya, and then one at the World Trade Center... or what's left of it.

It was tasteful. They didn't wallow. And I was shocked. Because I hates me some 9/11 wallowing. Why do Americans like to wallow so much? Why are we always just dyin' to go up to some chain link fence outside some disaster zone and put some flowers or a special note or some crap tht symbolizes the fragility of life and shit?

Because we loves us some drama. We loves us some martyrdom. We loves us some ethnocentrism. And we loves us some endless tears.

Wah, wah, wah.

I didn't know anyhone who died that day. My Dad died two months later. I was kinda more concerned about that. I mean, none of the 9/11 victims ever hung around the house or took me fishing or to a Cub game growing up or anything... so I was kinda partial to Dad, you know, as compared to the 9/11 victims.

I mean I know their corpses are the most important of all. More important than the half million civilians killed in Iraq. More important that some poor slob who died on the highway today.

I mean a corpse is a corpse, of course of course.
For a brief portion of a bad tasteless 9/11 Mr. Ed parody song moment, tune into Scintillating Commentary from today's show.
Link below:

http://www.937thezone.com/play_window.php?audioType=Episode&audioId=995121

And if you think that was tasteless, come down the the Brillo Box
4104 Penn Avenue in Lawrencville, for the Gab Bonesso Underground Comedy Extravaganza Tribute to 9/11!
Because, what's funnier than 9/11?

Tonight at 9pm! McIntire, Bonesso, Mo Mozuch, Nunya, along with headliner Jason Kirsch!

Let us tickle your 9/11 funnybone... or at least your genitals.

THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE

Hear today's Scintillating Commentary, eavesdropping on Bush and Cheney on 9/11, and making 9/11 easier for kids to deal with with Sweetie the Sweet Tasting Vodka for Kids, fresh out of the oven comedy bits at teh Zone web site:
www.937thezone.com

ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!

email me at Zone website above or johnmcintire@comcast.net

See yinz at the Brillo Box! Be there and be square.

BRITNEY VS. BUSH... WHO'S THE BIGGER EMBARRASSMENT ? EDITION

GOTTA LOVE THOSE MAC-YAPPER SPONSORS!
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The Hands Across The Burgosphere phenemonon is taking off. It's where we bloggers guilt trip you blogees into giving money for a really good cause. Like, say Pittsburgh Action Against Rape. Put up some cash will ya? So I can feel like my existence on the planet isn't totally useless. Click below won't yinz?
http://www.firstgiving.com/theburgher

Yo, yo, yo MacYippers! So you already know the Steelers kicked butt and the Browns may no longer actually belong in the NFL. You know the defense was awesome and despite an unimpressive overall passing yardage stat, BB threw four TD passes.

So I'm not going to dwell on it.
But while I was watching Tell Me You Love Me on HBO, touted for its explicit sex scenes among the major characters, Britney was bombing on MTV.

ASSOCIATED PRESS:
http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8RIBLGO0&show_article=1&image=large
LAS VEGAS (AP) - Somewhere, Kevin Federline is laughing. An out-of-shape, out-of-touch Britney Spears delivered what was destined to be the most talked about performance of the MTV Video Music Awards—but for all the wrong reasons.
Kicking off the show Sunday night with her new single, "Gimme More," Spears looked bleary and unprepared, much like her recent tabloid exploits on the streets of Los Angeles. She walked through her dance moves with little enthusiasm. She appeared to have forgotten the art of lip-synching. And, perhaps most unforgivable given her once-taut frame, she looked embarrassingly out of shape

MacYapper - The whore is getting to be a bore. Sleepwalking her way through what have been a big comeback moment will not make her the Comeback Kitten.

Does this matter? No.

What matters is that the Bushies are clearly planning on never leaving Iraq, and any token drawdown of troops will be just that. It'll be designed to provide cover for the continued effort. All these jarheads and jugheads with their "can do" attitudes are going to kill more kids and accomplish nothing.

As the Sunday NYT pointed out, things on the streets really aren't much better.
As Paul Krugman pointed out, there's been no independent verification of the alleged improvements touted by the Bushies.

As I point out, the world would have been better off with Saddam in power, and there would be, believe it or not, far fewer dead Iraqis.

George Bush I was right. George Bush II is the biggest disaster in the history of the presidency.

I think the American public STILL doesn't get the full fledged idiocy that has been foisted upon them by the US Supreme Court (we learn Justice Souter considered resigning after the disastrously illogical Busy v. Gore decision), Karl Rove, and the head in the sand members of the American public who were convinced by evil swiftboaters that the draft dodger was better than the war hero.

Yes, I still get worked up about this.

Call me Mr. Old School.

STILL LIVING OFF OF SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH

Of course you can be sure that Dubya will tie 9/11/01 in with the giant mess that he has created, as if it's Osama's fault that he was obsessed with Saddam.

And you can be sure that there are still millions of idiotic Americans who still don't get it that he's a liar and a disgrace.

I saw John Kerry on Stephanopolus pissed off about all this drumbeat indicating we're "staying the course." Apparently Kerry is free to be pissed off and normal now that he's not running for anything.

Did anyone see that a doctor who was forcded to treat injured Taliban when the U.S. initially invaded has confirmed that Bin Laden WAS INDEED AT TORA BORA?
Despite that lunkhead Tommy Franks writing op-ed pieces claiming we didn't know if he was there, we now know he was there.

And that confirms Dubya is an even bigger idiot. Because it was his administration that made the decision to use Afghan surrogates instead of American soldiers to surround Tora Bora. And that's why Osama got away.

And now Osama's releasing yet another videotape, featuring his newly darkened beard.
And Dubya and idiots like Fred Thompson and Mitt Romney are downplaying the significance of Osama.

Even as a mere symbol, he is significant. Dead or alive indeed. What a fucking joke.

And he's definitely a major part of the ongoing rebuilding of the the terrorist network, made possible by invading Iraq instead of keeping our eye on the ball.

Did you see Maureen Dowd's column indicating Dubya was at some cabinet meeting obsessing on whether the Secret Service had yet approved his mountain bike trail?
And some staffer who didn't want to be named commented who obsesses about their bike trail, other than Lance Armstrong or an eleven year old boy?

We have elected an eleven year old boy posing as a world leader. It is beyond frightening. It is beyond pathetic.

ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH! JOHN MCINTIRE GAB BONESSO GENE COLLIER, SEX, POLITICS, AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW!
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SPECIAL SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH COMEDY SHOW AT THE BRILLO BOX
What's so funny about September 11th? Nothing. We'll take a stab at it anyway at the Brillo Box on Penn Avenue in Lawrencville a week from tonight!

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LITTLEFIELD BLOWN OUT EDITION!

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Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! Ding, dong, the bitch is dead, Nutty Nutting Chopped his head!

Dave Littlefield, who I'm sure is a swell fellow with plenty of quality baseball knowledge who just happens to suck at his job, has been given the old heave ho!

He's probably got the dry heave ho's right now because one is led to believe this was a complete freaking surprise, since he was talkin' all like "yeah, dude, I'll be back next year fer sure," n'at.

POST-GAZETTE.COM:

http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/07250/815475-100.stm
The Pirates this morning fired general manager Dave Littlefield near the end of his seventh losing season.

He will be replaced on an interim basis by Brian Graham, the team's director of player development

MacYapper - But the PG makes it clear that Mr. Graham is just temporary, dude. And thank God for that. Because after the last two GM debacles, we could use somebody with a clue.

Don't get me wrong, I'm sure he was hampered and hamstrung and hamhocked and ham-on-ryed with those little inconvenient truths of no money and a lousy organization etc.
But some of the deals this dude made were out and out insane, everybody!

POST-GAZETTE.COM:
Littlefield, 47, took the post July 31, 2001, and his teams went a combined 442-581 in his tenure, never approaching .500. That included 67-95 finishes in 2005 and 2006, and the current edition's 61-79 record.

His contract, which was extended on opening day last year, was to run through the 2008 season.

MacYapper - Good for the Nuttings for not waiting until hell freezes over to get this done everybody! We need action everybody! Bucs suck, but so do Cubs, Cards, and Brew crew and they're all in the middle of a freaking pennant race! Everybody!

POST-GAZETTE.COM:
The firing was made by principal owner Bob Nutting, who already had been searching for a new CEO to replace outgoing Kevin McClatchy and now will add the general manager's post to that list.

"After eight months of listening and analyzing the situation, it has become clear that this decision was necessary to move our organization forward," Nutting said. "While there are many bright spots for us to build from, I am not satisfied with the overall performance and progress that has been made. I'm committed to building a successful organization, and this is an important step in that process."

Macyapper - Blah, diddy, blah, diddy, freaking blah. At least you didn't just sit there with your thumb up your ass. And what, exactly, are those freakin' bright spots? I kinda missed that part this season.

POST-GAZETTE.COM:
The firing of Littlefield will not affect the search for CEO, Nutting added. One person will be hired for each post.

"The search process for our new club president has clarified for me that the president and general manager positions are two distinct functions. I believe both individuals must have strong baseball backgrounds. The president will lead the overall day-to-day operations. It is clear, however, that most successful teams also have a strong general manager in place with a single-minded focus on leading the baseball operations."

MacYapper - I would think the new CEO would want a say in the new GM. But then, I have no particular expertise in this matter. But then again, neither do the Nuttings.

POST-GAZETTE.COM:
Littlefield accompanied the Pirates for their four-game series to St. Louis and, according to those close to him, had been behaving as if he were confident he would be back next year. The Pirates flew back to Pittsburgh last night after their 16-4 loss to the Cardinals at Busch Stadium, and Littlefield was notified of the decision at roughly 10 a.m.

MacYapper - Man Behaving Badly. Dead Man Walking.
So long Dave. There must be a ballclub even worse than the Buccos that can take you on.
Then again...

THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW 1-4 PM 93.7 THE ZONE

We had Littlefield up the wazoo.

Post-Gazette columnist Brian O'Neill confirmed Dave's many, many boneheaded moves and said he deserves to get the ax.
Johnny "Mustache Ride" Steigerwald announced that he was going to be the next GM, and then hastily retracted it. He says Dave didn't suddenly turn stupid when he came here and claimed it will make no difference whatsoever to yhave a new GM because the Bucs will never spend any real doe on payroll.
KDKA's Jeff Hathorne struck a more middle ground note, agreeing that the Nuttings suck but saying that Littlefield had to go because something's got to change and you might as well start at the top. Can't fire the players n 'at.

DC blogger Mike Rogers, who originally outed Larry the Toe Tapper Craig before Bathroomgate, said he doesn't feel sorry for Larry at all because of what he described as his horrendous anti-gay voting record. Although he also said he thought it was disgraceful the way his fellow republican senators threw him under the bus.

PG Columnist Tony Norman and I disagreed on comedian Eddie Griffin being yanked in the middle of a comedy set at a fancy schmancy African-American big do in south Florida for liberally using the N word in his set.
Norman thought you have to analyze your audience and he screwed up. I'm asking, as a caller did yesterday, who's the moron who booked this guy who always says the N word in his sets?

Comedian Robert Schimmel pontificated (in a really cool and interesting way) on the Eddie Griffin thing. He thinks stand-up comedy is the last bastion of free speech and we've really got something to worry about here, although he agrees with Norman that there's a time and place for everything.
Schimmel's at the Pittsburgh Improv this weekend.

ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH! JOHN MCINTIRE GAB BONESSO GENE COLLIER, SEX, POLITICS, AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW!
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SPECIAL SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH COMEDY SHOW AT THE BRILLO BOX
What's so funny about September 11th? Nothing. We'll take a stab at it anyway at the Brillo Box on Penn Avenue in Lawrencville a week from tonight!

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Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers!
What up?

Do you believe that disingenuous douchebagette Kathleen Willey is back? She was about to write a book trashing the Clintons, just in time for Hillary's inevitable coronation, and somebody (she claims) stole the galleys from her apartment.

Bullshit.

First, I distinctly recall that she wrote a fawning letter to the Clintons at the White House after he allegedly groped her. Secondly, and much more significantly, the bitch lied to Independent Counsel Robert Ray, the guy who took over for Ken Starr. It was determined Kathleen lied to the FBI so they didn't try to use her for anything. How could this happen? SHE'S A LIAR.

Thirdly, and this was hardly reported anywhere by the media as I recall, Linda Tripp her own self testified that Willey tried to get a relationship going with Bill from day freaking one! This bitch is still looking for the remainder of her 15 minutes, some cash from a bogus book, and she has permanently attatched herself to the right wing attack machine.

Here's a blog to check out more facts and info about the lying sack of feces Kathleen.

http://lefarkins.blogspot.com/2007/04/slick-willey.html

JOSH MARSHALL:

So how credible is Kathleen Willey? Apparently, not very credible at all. And that's not the word from some Clinton lapdog, but from the OIC itself. Appendix B of Ray's report analyzes Willey's accusations and concludes, rather hermetically, that "there was insufficient evidence to prove to a jury beyond a reasonable doubt that President Clinton's testimony regarding Kathleen Willey was false." But that conclusion is a comic understatement when read in the context of the report's Appendix B. The OIC lawyers couldn't even convince themselves that Willey was credible, let alone prove it beyond a reasonable doubt to a jury. They had already concluded that Willey was a liar.

For instance, as Appendix B explains, Willey's testimony in the Jones suit differed from what she told the Lewinsky grand jury. It was contradicted by the testimony of other witnesses friendly to the OIC. And, most damning, during the period when Willey was cooperating with the OIC under an immunity agreement, the OIC caught her in a lie about her relationship with a former boyfriend. (As the report phrases it, with oblique understatement, "Following Willey's acknowledgment [of the lie], the Independent Counsel agreed not to prosecute her for false statements in this regard.")

In other words, the OIC did not opt to forego prosecution of President Clinton on the Willey front because it could not prove Willey's credibility to a jury: They themselves believed she was not a credible witness. That makes you wonder why the OIC lawyers pursued their case against Julie Hiatt Steele based purely on Willey's word. And if the OIC now thinks Willey isn't credible, why didn't this get a bit more play in the press? (And should we wait around, in Part 2 of the report, for an apology to Julie Hiatt Steele?)

MacYapper - So Kathleen the liar got immunity and then admitted she lied. But why did she lie? Why lie about a former boyfriend? Why say one thing to the Paula Jones jury and another to the Lewinsky jury? BECAUSE SHE'S A LIAR.

Our old friend Bob Somerby, who runs DailyHowler.com, reported extensively on this lying lunatic. Bob performed standup with Gab and myself at a Get Out The Vote event with Will Durst late last year.

Go Bobby!

DAILYHOWLER.COM:
http://www.dailyhowler.com/dh061003.shtml

According to Tripp’s detailed, sworn testimony, Willey pursued a romance with Clinton right from the start of her White House employment. Willey had speculated with Tripp as to how she might be able to set up an assignation between herself and the president. She routinely attended events at which Clinton would be present, wearing a black dress she believed he liked. According to Tripp’s testimony, she wondered if she and Clinton could arrange to meet in a home to which she had access along the Chesapeake Bay.

Tripp also challenged Willey’s account of that Oval Office meeting. According to Tripp, Willey had arranged the meeting in part to see if her flirtation with Clinton might advance. And when Clinton and Willey did meet in the Oval, Willey rushed back to Tripp’s office to describe it. According to Tripp, Willey “smiled from ear to ear the entire time” as she described the event. “She seemed almost shocked, but happy shocked,” Tripp told the grand jury. Willey told Tripp that she and Clinton had smooched—but there was no talk of a sexual assault. In short, Tripp’s testimony threw into question the story Willey told in March—the story foolish pundits had sworn by. Clinton, of course, has denied that anything inappropriate happened during that meeting.

In short, Tripp substantially contradicted Willey’s 60 Minutes story. By any fair standard, this was news. When Willey was calling Clinton a groper, the press corps ran her onto the air, and pundits swore that she was truthful. Now, Tripp had told a quite different story. If the press corps had a scintilla of fairness, they would have rushed to report this news too.

MacYapper - So, according to Linda Tripp, who as we know DESPISED the Clintons perhaps more than anybody, Kathleen Willey was just a harlet on the make. And was happy about her little hugfest with Billy.

And Somerby rightly questions, as others have, why the fuck the news media didn't give the same credence to Tripp's testimony outing Willey as a liar as they did Willey's initial appearance on 60 Minutes with the now deceased Ed Bradley.

Anyway, apparently Kathleen has another copy of this drivel, and it's on her computer hard drive as well.

I can't believe these right wing nutbag sea creatures from Pondscumville still exist to torture us.

LARRY THE TOE-TAPPER UPDATE

Consensus: still toast. Won't be able to overturn the Minneapolis conviction. Is still basing his potential flip flop on resigning on whether he can get that guilty plea withdrawn. High priced lawyers talk a good game but Minnesota judges won't give a damn.

Mike Rogers, the D.C. blogger who first outed Toe-Tapper, is on the show tomorrow,Friday, probably during the 1 pm hour.

Also on Friday, 2pm Johnny "Mustache Ride" Steigerwald previewing Stillers and Brownies.

3pm Mike Balzer and Shane Portman from sketch comedy troupe Animal Club performing at Cabaret Theater Saturday night.

Also, appearing at the Improv this weekend, and on the radio show during the 3pm hour, comedian Robert Schimmel!

ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH! JOHN MCINTIRE GAB BONESSO GENE COLLIER, SEX, POLITICS, AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW!
www.improv.com

SPECIAL SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH COMEDY SHOW AT THE BRILLO BOX
What's so funny about September 11th? Nothing. We'll take a stab at it anyway at the Brillo Box on Penn Avenue in Lawrencville a week from tonight!

COMEDY AUDIO AT www.myspace.com/Macyapper

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Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! Do you believe this freakin' clown? Larry The Toe Tapper Craig just doesn't know when to quit.

He should quit while the quittin' is good. Winners never quit, but losers don't know when to quit.

I knew it yesterday when he pimped out his kids on Good Morning America that he wasn't done bitching about this.
Wanna see something funny? Check out Larry The Toe Tapper's first denial of being a homo back in the early 80's:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=0RntWGPEjoo

MacYapper - Meantime, the NYT reports that despite Toe Tapper's claim that he's going to fight the charges to which he's already pleaded guilty, it ain't exactly gonna be a walk in the park... or even a stroll through the restroom:

NYTIMES.COM:
http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/09/05/senator-craigs-legal-options/
Senator Larry E. Craig, Republican of Idaho, says he regrets pleading guilty to disorderly conduct in an airport restroom, and he has indicated that he will try to back out of the deal. It won’t be easy, but it may not be impossible.
“As a general proposition, a guilty plea is very, very hard to undo, and there has to be a very good reason,” said Frank O. Bowman, who teaches criminal law at the University of Missouri.

MacYapper - And of course the good reason is that he thought no one would find out about it, but they did, so he's embarrassed, so he's trying to pretend he's not guilty. Toe Tapper was foolishly encouraged by our own Arlen Specter, who points out that legally the case is bullshit. But when you're trying to hide other gay sex from the past, you don't want to open up a can of Pandora's box. Or is it a can of whoopass? Something.

NYTIMES.COM:
But Mr. Craig, whose staff has now indicated that he may not resign at the end of this month as he had announced on Saturday, may have more options under Minnesota law than he would elsewhere.
A Minnesota law allows pleas to be withdrawn “to correct a manifest injustice.” Just last week, a state appeals court allowed a man convicted of burglary to withdraw his guilty plea.
The man, Rickford R. Munger, conceded at his plea hearing that he had invaded a woman’s privacy by moving a curtain on her open first-floor window.
But being a peeping tom is not the same as being a burglar, the Court of Appeals of Minnesota said on Aug. 28. Burglary requires proof that the defendant entered a building with the intent to commit a crime.
Moving the curtain was enough to establish entering the building, the court said, but Mr. Munger had not acknowledged that he had intended to commit a crime inside the building.
Mr. Craig may have a similar argument. In a written plea agreement dated Aug. 1, he admitted that he had “engaged in conduct which I knew or should have known tended to arouse alarm or resentment or others which conduct was physical (versus verbal) in nature.”

MacYapper - Jesus, he's gonna need Perry Freaking Mason, Johnny Freaking Cochran, and Fred Freaking Thompson to manuever through this legal minefield.

I'm just happy Mr. HeDaHo is dragging this thing out, because I'm gonna live off this baby for weeks. Great fodder.

Hello mudder. Hello fodder.

John McIntire Show legal analyst and conservative republican Heather Heidelbaugh will riff about this during the one pm hour on Thursday.

The blogger who originally outed Toe Tapper, Mike Rogers, will be on the show on Friday.


ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH! JOHN MCINTIRE GAB BONESSO GENE COLLIER, SEX, POLITICS, AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW!
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SPECIAL SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH COMEDY SHOW AT THE BRILLO BOX
What's so funny about September 11th? Nothing. We'll take a stab at it anyway at the Brillo Box on Penn Avenue in Lawrencville a week from tonight!

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KIDS PIMPING FOR HE-DA-HO EDITION

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Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! Want to see something disgusting? Check out the interview with Senator He-Da-Ho's adult children on Good Morning America with Diane Sawyer.

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=3555208
ABCNEWS.GO.COM:
"He was a victim of circumstance, in the wrong place at the wrong time," said Michael Craig of his father's arrest.

Michael Craig and his sister, Shea Howell, decided to speak out about the scandal, but not before making sure that they had all the answers necessary to confidently defend their father.

MacYapper - If you've still got that great bridge that ends in Brooklyn, and you're looking to unload it, you might want to check in with Michael Craig and Shea Howell. They bought Daddy-Ho's B.S. hook, line, and sphincter.

If Michael isn't gay, he should be. And a victim of circumstances? Yes, circumstantially he's been outed by a gay blogger notorious for outing Congressmen and Senators, he hangs out in a bathroom notorious for gay sex pick-ups, he decides to plead guilty to a charge he now claims not to be guilty of, and he keeps yammering on about "I'm not gay" in his police interview, instead of just saying you're full of shit, I don't know what you're talking about, and either arrest me or I'm out of here, as any normal person whose INNOCENT would do.

ABCNEWS.GO.COM:
Before standing in support behind the senator at Saturday's news conference, Craig and Howell asked their father tough questions. They wanted to know whether he had ever been in any way unfaithful to their mother.

"No legalities, no technicalities. … We wanted to know exactly what happened," Craig said.

The senator's children have concluded that anyone else in a similar situation would have simply said "excuse me" after bumping their foot into someone and moved on. But their father bumped into an undercover police officer, who they say was looking for a different interpretation of his actions.

MacYapper - Yes, but any average citizen accused of something based on entrapment would tell the cop to go F himself. He only pleaded guilty because he's guilty... if not of disorderly conduct, he's guilty of having solicited gay sex before, and that's what he was doing in the Minneapolis airport bathroom.

And if he wasn't an anti-gay rights phony baloney Family Values Republican, nobody would even care about what he was doing in the airport bathroom. And now he's hoodwinkes his kids into fronting for him? What a scumbag.

ABCNEWS.GO.COM:
"It was tough standing next to him, but we are family and we stay together through good times and bad," Craig said. "We know who he is and we stand behind him."

MacYapper - Well I'd rather stand behind him than in front of him, but I still think pimping out his kids like this when he knows he's a lying sack of feces is lower than low.

ABCNEWS.GO.COM:
Howell and Craig, who maintain their father's heterosexuality, said that even if he were gay, they would still support him. "Gay or straight, that part doesn't matter," Craig said.

"My dad is so protective of us. He has seven grandkids between my sister and I. He knows he chose to be in politics. He knew what life that would entail but he didn't choose it for us."

MacYapper - But he did choose to pretend to be a Family Values homophobe while having a secret life (not so secret any more) of soliciting gay sex.
But good luck kids. And be careful getting back up in the turnip truck.

LABOR DAY PARADE
Good to see all our AFTRA buddies at the big Labor Day parade yesterday. We drove the Zone Mobile, a Hummer. And no one cared. But there was really no reason they should. Still, a beautiful day for a parade. Thanks to that guy who gave me the "Support the Troops End The War" sign for my front yard.

COMEDY SHOWS PAST AND PRESENT

It was good to see David DeAngelo of 2politicaljunkies and his "sweetie" at the BackStage Bar for the free night of comedy last Saturday. Our thanks to David Kaye of Slapsticks Comedy Loft, and Moe Mozuch for performing with us. It was not good to see the lighting director at the neighboring Cabaret Theater, who heckled and laughed like Woody Woodpecker much of the evening.
But hey, poltics ain't beanbag, and comedy ain't always pretty. We'll be back at the BackStage Bar with Gene Collier on September 22nd at 9:30. Collier will be having quite a weekend because the play he co-wrote "The Chief" about Art Rooney Sr. will also be playing at the O'Reilly Theater that night. More details about that as we go.

ZONE NIGHT AT THE IMPROV - WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 26TH! JOHN MCINTIRE GAB BONESSO GENE COLLIER, SEX, POLITICS, AND RELIGION COMEDY SHOW!
www.improv.com

SPECIAL SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH COMEDY SHOW AT THE BRILLO BOX
What's so funny about September 11th? Nothing. We'll take a stab at it anyway at the Brillo Box on Penn Avenue in Lawrencville a week from tonight!

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