DUMB AND DUMBER AND THIS GUY EDITION

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POLITICAL POP PODCAST WITH JOHN AND GAB!

Fans of the old John McIntire radio show with Gab Bonesso, here's your crack!
The latest episode of political pop!
Politicians nailed in sex scandals! Is Wiz Khalifa worth the Khalifa his Wiz is printed on? Is there actually funny television on the major networks?
What's wrong with the way Christina Aguilara sings? Will Keith Olbermann break through on an obscure Al Gore TV channel? Has Eminem lost it now that he don't drink no mo? These and other burning questions, singeing your brain cells with wild abandon! Click! Listen up damnit!


WHY ARE HORNY POLS GETTING STUPIDER?

I just don't understand. I'm not the brightest bulb in the drawer.

I've made some dumbo mistakes in my life. But compared to this maroon, I'm Dumbo Shrimp.

If you're a mother F'in MARRIED New York State Congressman, then why, why, why, in the name of all that is sacred and holy (or in this case isn't), would you put a shirtless picture of yourself on the innertubes looking for a "date"?

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/02/10/us/politics/10lee.html?partner=rss&emc=rss
Representative Christopher Lee of New York abruptly resigned on Wednesday night after a shirtless photo of himself, which he had e-mailed to a woman, was published on the Internet.


“Will someone prove to me not all CL men look like toads?” the woman asked in the ad, using the initials for Craigslist.

Mr. Lee responded to the ad using a Gmail account that Gawker said it had traced to Mr. Lee’s personal Facebook account.

“Hi,” Mr. Lee wrote in the first e-mail. “Hope I’m not a toad.”

No, you're an a-hole. And I'm not judging you on grounds of morality. Whatever that is.

But you've taken stupidity to a new, record, historic level. I thought Ben Roethilisberger was the biggest dumbass on earth. But he didn't leave any physical evidence. Or if he did, somebody cleaned it up.

You put it on the web, and Gawker busted your insanely stupid butt.

I realize you're only one of 435, most of whom are, who? But dude, discretion isn't only the better part of valor, it's what saves dumbasses from being exposed as nincompoops! Or is it the other way around?

Photos.
Don't. Send. Photos.
Moron.

http://gawker.com/#!5755071/married-gop-congressman-sent-sexy-pictures-to-craigslist-babe
Yesterday, we reached out to Rep. Lee, whose support for "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" and vote to reject federal abortion funding suggests a certain comfort with publicly scrutinizing others' sex lives.

Man. That makes it sweeter than sugar pie. He tried to deny it. His staff said his computer had been hacked. That he only posted something on line once to try to sell furniture.

But no one at Gawker was buying the bullshit he was selling. And now he's out, out, out.

My original point deals with stupidity. Even rising-star-horntoad (who also doesn't look like a toad.... more like a lizard... the Lizard King Jim Morrison warned us about) Johnny Boner (Boehner, you pick your favorite pronunciation) has no actual incriminating photos. That we know of. Yet.

He met. He canoodled. He vamoosed.

I was going to try a he-came he-saw play on words but that doesn't seem to work.

But this Christopher Lee guy personifies the current brand of arrogance, stupidity, and frankly just lack of common sense, that is indicative of a new brand of moronic hubris.

It's not the heat it's the Hubridity.

Stubris?

KEITH AND THE MAN

Al Gore is the man.

Without Al, we might all be wondering about what the F is causing ice storms in Dallas. Now we can be comforted by the fact that it's climate change, and we're all gonna die in a horrible weather emergency. But at least we can understand and come to terms with it.

Al's Current cable TV channel has great potential. But it has yet to have great ratings. Keith Olbermann signed a non-compete which prevents him from working at CNN, Fox, or anyone else considered a direct competitor.

That's one big reason why he signed with Current. Gore reached out to him directly.

Some believe it's pure genius. Keith has invested his own cashola in this. He'll head up the News Division, however large or small that turns out to be.

Some believe it's pure folly. Current averages around 25,000 viewers in prime time. It's available in about 75,000,000 homes. You do the math.

I'm inclined to side with the folks who think it's brilliant.

http://www.csmonitor.com/USA/Elections/Vox-News/2011/0209/He-went-where-Keith-Olbermann-s-move-to-Current-TV-makes-sense-for-now
This acquisition makes perfect sense for Current, says Robert Thompson, founder of the Bleier Center of Television and Popular Culture at Syracuse University in New York. “Keith Olbermann has found a spot in the cultural zeitgeist,” he points out, a feat that puts him in a rare spot, wherever it may be. “What ‘South Park’ did for Comedy Central and what ‘Queer Eye for the Straight Guy’ did for Bravo,” he says, Mr. Olbermann can now do for Current TV.

Precisely. My only caveat in this prognostication is, what kind of resources will Keith have? Certainly he won't have the power and scope of NBC News. But maybe it will be a vastly different kind of show. Will some of his Countdown regulars still be allowed to appear on Current?

Then again he did Sports Center with little more than other people's video and clever writing.

Mostly I'm glad he's back in the 8pm time slot. I need loud. I need humorous. I need the bastards to be hit over the head with a crowbar when they deserve it.

God bless Lawrence O'Donnell, Keith's replacement at 8pm on MSNBC.

He's smart, knowledgeable, and to the point. But he's just too damn mellow for 8pm. He belonged at 10. The come down in energy is not only palpable, it's disappointing.

Keith's new show starts at the end of May! Perhaps he can resurrect "Worst Persons In The World" an hysterical feature until the PC wimps acted as if it was too mean spirited for their itty bitty feewings.

Finally, Big Al is letting Big Keith contribute cash to Dems or whoever the hell he wants.

Busting Keith's chops for favoring Democrats was beyond Re-Goddamn-diculous.

DOES KEITH KNOW WHO'S THE BOSS?
http://www.popeater.com/2011/02/10/keith-olbermann-al-gore-current/
"No doubt Al is very happy to have Keith join his network," one Current TV insider tells me. "Yet Keith is a double-edged sword. He'll attract a huge amount of media and viewers to the network, but let's be honest, he's a total pain in the ass to deal with."

DUDE. It'll be worth it.


JOIN MY MERRY BAND OF ANTI-WARBLING POLICE

My mother started to hate modern day singers before her passing not long ago. I don't think they caused her passing, unless you can die from severe annoyance.

She didn't like how they strung out notes, uppity, downditty, roundy and rounditty.

I wondered if Mom was just too old fashioned. But then I realized, she was right. Warbling became commonplace and contrived.

Thank Gawd this dude over at HuffPo summed up the annoyance, to legitimize my pet peevery.

John Eskow was not concerned with Christina Aguilera's screwing up the National Anthem lyrics at the Super Bowl. It was the warbling. He's got a better word for it.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/john-eskow/christina-aguilera-and-th_b_819979.html
It's called melisma -- the bending of syllables for bluesy or soulful effect -- and what's creepy about the way it's used now is that it perverts America's true genius for song, as evinced by its creators in the world of gospel and R&B, like Ray Charles and Aretha Franklin.

You will hear more of this tonsil-twisting insincerity -- to your eternal sorrow -- if you watch any episode of American Idol.

The great Jerry Wexler -- who produced both Ray and Aretha -- coined a great term for it: "oversouling." He described it as "the gratuitous and confected melisma" that hollows out a song and drains it of meaning. Wexler, who knew more about soul than any producer before or since, said:

"Time and again I have found that flagrantly artificial attempts at melisma are either a substitute for real fire and passion or a cover-up for not knowing the melody... Please, learn the song first, and then sing it from the heart."

Couldn't hurt to learn the freaking lyrics either.

POST-GAZETTE'S BRIAN O'NEILL REVIEWS MAC-YAPPER VIDEO

Brian O'Neill is a fine columnist for the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.

He happened upon the MacYapper blog the other day, and was amused by my jealously of homeless-guy-turned-guy-with-several-lucrative-offers Ted Williams.

Hence he wrote the following. Enjoy. Or not. I thought it was groovy.

POST-GAZETTE.COM:
http://post-gazette.com/pg/11034/1122562-155.stm?cmpid=bcpanel2
I'm not sure I've ever helped anyone go viral, at least not since I went to work at Waldbaum's deli with bronchitis 35 years ago.

But "going viral'' is now the buzzword of new media. Ya gotta make something wildly popular in a flash, even if that popularity has a shorter shelf life than your average banana.

The most obvious recent example would be Ted Williams, the homeless fellow with the sonorous voice whose image was captured last month at a highway off-ramp by a videographer with The Columbus Dispatch. Mr. Williams' baritone was so captivating that he wound up all over the TV talk shows and was offered more jobs than most Ivy Leaguers.

Long battling alcoholism, he entered rehab after receiving national attention. I saw a report that he's out again, but in this hyperspeed age, Mr. Williams is already yesterday's news. The media are now going 24/7 with Steelers/brrr-it's-cold/Egypt, roughly in that order. The mid-January fame of Mr. Williams now seems a very long time ago.

John McIntire remembers, though. I called up his MacYapper blog the other day and found Pittsburgh's own "underemployed broadcaster and comedian'' going full tilt, like an auctioneer with two minutes to live, in an ostentatiously envious, politically incorrect way about how this homeless man gets all the breaks.

His screed had only 162 views by Wednesday morning, which is more like a polite cough than a virus. But it's funny.

Here is the video to which Brian refers.



Just as it is as American as apple pie to romanticize about a rags to riches fairytale, so too is it as American as wasting money on crap at Target, to envy those who convert the aforementioned rags to actual cash-money.

Hence, I join a long list of extinguished Americans in my effort to keep up with the Joneses. Or in this case the Williams. ses.

Can I out homeless the homeless guy and hence out succeed him in the long run?

Ah, the great American soap opera. You doubt me? Wash your mouth out with soap opera.

ACTING!

I'm not an actor but I play one on TV. Well, on the innertubes. I play a liberal US Senate Candidate. He makes a big mistake. Hence, he loses. Coincidentally, the script was written by a GOP ad man. Go figure.

MOVING NUMBERS_EPISODE 8_Fourth And Ten from Zolitics on Vimeo.

IN OTHER NEWS, PEOPLE STILL **DEBATE** WHETHER PALIN'S AN IDIOT



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