GOING "WOO!" IN AMERICA EDITION

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MAC-YAPPER ON WQED-TV FRIDAY NIGHT! NEWS DISCUSSION SHOW CALLED "4802."

7:30 PM! EVERYBODY'S FAVORITE CONSERVATIVE HEATHER HEIDELBAUGH ALSO ON SHOW! HOSTED BY TONIA CARUSO!
REPLAY AT MIDNIGHT!

Yo MacYippers!

SPEAKING OF SPORTS...

*Since it's a law one must use baseball metaphors, let's give Barack N' Roll his due... he hit one out of the park, a grand salami everybody, at the Tucson memorial service.

*But things were strange at the old let's-feel-sad-about-dead-people-ballpark, everybody, as the fans in the stands were inexplicably boisterous.

*In other words, were it not for Barry O's most excellent speech, there would be much more buzz about the oddly inappropriate pep rally which broke out when fans couldn't stop going "woo!"

*Americans live to go "woo!" This way, they are part of the ballgame, everybody. Um, memorial service. Well you know, six of one...

*The President of the University of Arizona apparently set the scene and approved the script for this pep rally, and for that, he should be forced to watch Fox and Friends for a week. It was weird. He was weird.

*Americans unable to keep from going "woo" at a memorial service is the exact equivalent to their inability to shut the F up in a movie theater.

*More or less.

*Sarah Palin. Once again the debate is... did she use the slanderous, outmoded, completely inappropriate phrase "blood libel" in her stupendously stupid reply to her crosshair critics because (a.) she was secretly trying to signal bigoted anti-Semitic Christians (or as some like to call them, the Republican base... oops! violating the new spirit of bipartisanship), or (b.) just completely ignorant!?

*The latter wins by unanimous acclamation.

*So "blood libel" means Jews kidnapping Christian kids to kill them and use their blood to make matzah?

*Why don't you ever see that on any of those cooking shows?

*Roger Ailes allegedly has told his punks to tone it down.

*How long do you think that'll last?

*I believe Ailes may have been sincere. Of course my butt is still sore from falling off the turnip truck.

*There is a core constituency of GOP leaning nutbags that honestly believes there is a second American revolution afoot. They are encouraged by GOP crazy chicks (um, candidates and holders of public office), who suggest they "reload" or find "2nd amendment remedies" or be "armed and dangerous."

*Not trying to be provocative. Not trying to suspend the lovely new era of Kumbaya bipartisanship. Just stating the truth.

*What characterizes these humans is (a.) hatred for guv-ment, (b.)hatred of liberals, (c.) strong desire to go "woo!" loudly at any and all public events.

*Democrats and liberals also go "woo!"

*It is a unifying, bipartisan achievement, and also one of the most annoying things about Americans of all stripes.

*Note to nuts: There is NOT a 2nd American revolution underway requiring you to take up arms and shoot some Democrats.

*Just thought I'd get that on the record.

*Do you freaking believe that Johnny The Big Baby Boehner decided NOT to attend the memorial service in Tucson, and INSTEAD attended a cocktail party in D.C.?

*Yes. Speaks. Volumes.

*Cocktails trump Grief Fests every time. This is America.

*Big Ben used his four weeks off (suspension for um, raping and stuff) to work on his throwing motion.

POST-GAZETTE.COM:
http://post-gazette.com/pg/11013/1117585-66.stm
Roethlisberger took the month he could not appear at the Steelers' facility to work with quarterbacks coach George Whitfield Jr., and he tinkered with his delivery.

"He worked extremely hard when he was off on his accuracy and changed his motion a little bit, and it's paid off for him all season," said Bruce Arians, the Steelers' offensive coordinator.

*So, if yinz Stillers go to da Super Bowl, there a couple of heroic young rape victims who deserve the thanks of the Stiller Nation. Um, allegedly. And stuff.

*Gabby Giffords opened her eyes for the first time.

*If only paranoid Republicans who erroneously fear the guv-ment is coming to take away their guns could open their eyes.

*Then we could stop pretending all citizens need Glocks that shoot 30 or more rounds.

*But of course, after the assassination attempt, Americans went out and bought thousands of Glocks.

*After which, they likely went "woo!"

*Paranoia and fear is why the gun control debate can never be laid out rationally.

*Paranoia and fear is what Republicans are brilliant at spreading.

*GOP would counter "what about all that Democratic nonsense about the GOP wanting to take your social security and end medicare"?

*Except that those claims are actually true.

*And these days, many of them would actually admit it.

*I watched Fox and Friends for a few seconds today, before the Beast of Bile Michelle Malkin made me vomit and flip the channel.

*But I did see conservative nutbag journalist John Stossel talking about social security cuts. When asked by Fox's Steve Doocey "who's gonna take care of us when we're old and sick?" Stossel replied, "we can take care of ourselves."

*Um I think history taught us that we can't. Hence, social security and medicare.

*If and when there are deep cuts in either social security or medicare, the GOP will undoubtedly let out a collective, emphatic, joyously bombastic "WOO!"

*Ain't that America, for you and me.

*Obama did really, really well at the rally-sadfest.

*woo.

TED WILLIAMS-HOMELESS ANNOUNCER GUY??? HOW ABOUT MOI?




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