COULD WE JUST PASS THE FREAKING SMOKING BAN ALREADY?

MacYapper - John McIntire


FREE CYRIL!


www.izzazu.com

Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! What up?
Once again in the recent primary we learned that we are not exactly the most progressive state in the union. We're not old school, we're dinosaur school. Schools haven't even been built yet. They haven't invented the concept of education. The inhabitants of this backward land haven't even made it to the final step of evolution. That means a lot of them look like Dubya.

As evidence I offer the fact that everybody and their grandmothers have passed smoking bans. We haven't. We couldn't. That would require progressive modern thought. It would necessitate a state of mind that put health concerns over the right of people to help kill one another by blowing poison gas around.

I've written and spoken about this until I'm even sick and tired of hearing myself bitch. And that takes some doing. But the Post-Gazette Editorial Board put together nice compilation of facts supporting the obvious correct conclusion, because our esteemed legislature is dealing with this matter... AGAIN.

POST-GAZETTE.COM EDITORIAL:
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08119/877128-35.stm
• Last Wednesday Atlantic City Council voted to close the last major loophole in New Jersey's tough, statewide ban on smoking in public places by extending it to casinos. More than two dozen states regulate smoking inside casinos, eight ban it outright in the gambling halls and two others will do so next year.

• April 16 -- Iowa instituted a statewide smoking ban so that, starting July 1, no one may light up a cigarette or cigar inside an Iowa bar, restaurant or most places of employment.

MacYapper - So even evil Atlantic City gets it. Wheeling, West Virginia gets it.

As the PG editorial points out, there are anti-smoking laws in Maine, Nebraska, Maryland, Arizona, California, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, Hawaii, Illinois, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Montana, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, Ohio, Oregon, Rhode Island, Utah, Vermont and Washington.

They've even passed smoking bans in Mexico City and Bejing!

COULD SOMEBODY PLEASE TELL THESE NEANDERTHALS IT'S TIME TO GET THIS DONE??!!

CHILD STAR GETS GRIEF OVER SCANTILLY CLAD POSE

OK, the kid's only 15, so leave her the F alone. Miley Cyrus that is. I don't know Hannah Montana from Billings, Montana, but I get annoyed when I see a kid raked over the coals for messing around like a kid.

Although I guess it's not just messing around if you're being photographed by Vanity Fair.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/28/business/media/28hannah.html?em&ex=1209441600&en=b1f7b57ff8536ca0&ei=5087%0A


I don't find this photo particularly scandalous. The magazine says her parents or "minders" were there the whole time. Teens are sexual these days. That's it. You can't turn back the clock or put the genie back in the bottle or put Pandora back in her box or insert your favorite cliche here.

But it seems to me that in the wake of the Vanessa Hudgens scandal...

it would seem obvious that everyone in the universe would understand that if you want to be a squeaky clean child star with a squeaky clean image then you have to be clean and you have to squeak a lot. That would seem to eliminate marginally provocative photos in Vanity Fair, or the kind of photos Miley has been releasing in myspace that have made their way onto the internet.




So, even though none of these are in my view particularly scandalous, they would appear to be perhaps a calculated effort to create more Miley Buzz. I guess every kid star knows they can't be a member of the Mickey Mouse Club forever, and that turning into a slut or at least a mildly sexy provocateur is the possible next career move.


So let's stop acting like this is news. It's just bidness. And in Amurica, bidness is bidness. As a wise man observed...
NYTIMES.COM:
Last week, Gary Marsh, the president of entertainment for Disney Channel Worldwide, was quoted in Portfolio magazine saying, “For Miley Cyrus to be a ‘good girl’ is now a business decision for her. Parents have invested in her a godliness. If she violates that trust, she won’t get it back.

JEREMIAH WRIGHT IS DOING THE BLACK DUDE WRONG

http://firstread.msnbc.msn.com/archive/2008/04/28/951094.aspx
MSNBC.COM - CHUCK TODD:
At this point, no matter one's political inexperience, Wright has to know he's not helping his friend; his decision to go public and defend his reputation at this point in the campaign is doing nothing to help Obama, if anything, it's leading some to believe he's actually trying to sabotage him. He's hurting him and hurting him very badly. Frankly, it’s as selfish of a move as we've seen in some time.

MacYapper - Of course Chuck is forgetting Billary's move to continue the bloodshed until the last dog dies. But it's a toss-up. I'd say Billary is more justified than Rev. Blather.

Andrea Mitchell reported on MSNBC this morning that, surprise, surprise, The Rev. Wright has a book coming out on a couple of months. Bidness is bidness.

I'm sure it's just a coincidence that he's chosen to do the major lecture circuit thing.

It's simple. He's an egomaniac with a God complex. How dare anyone criticize anything he's ever said? Obama is dead to him and he couldn't care less how he hurts his former friend. He's a bombastic babbler. And we're stuck with him for a while.


MAC-YIPPER CHUCK DELEHANTY TAKES MAC-YAPPER TO TASK:
Your recent blog notes that the people I believe are politically correctly referred to as "African American" you refer to as "negroes".

MacYapper - Chuckles, it's a joke. It notes that many old school Keystone staters think of blacks as negroes, a very old school, now completely out of date term.

CHUCK:
Then you note that "salt" is a condiment. Wikipedia says that while some consider salt a condiment, it is more strictly considered a seasoning.

MacYapper - Chuckles, you're insane. Please don't ever site Wikipedia as a credible source again.

CHUCK ON STEALING OF THE 2000 ELECTION:
So, Scalia didn't sell out anything. He has been, and still is, a far right mouthpiece. It is sad is that millions of Americans believe the justices are fair. When will they learn?

MacYapper - On this point Chuckles, ya got me.

And Leslie Stall's giggly overly flattering profile of Scalia was vomitous.

PET PEEVES OF YOUR MAC-YAPPER

I just yelled at some woman who was parking in front of my driveway. Why do people park in front of driveways? Why do they think it's OK to to that during the day, as if there's some daylight exemption and this common sense rule only applies at night?

I yelled "hey, you can't park in front of driveways. My neighbor parks there. You can't park there."

She yelled back, "but I'm only going to blah blah blah and I couldn't park up there."

As if when there's no place to park, it's THEN OK to park in front of the driveway.

I concluded, "see, you just can't park in front of driveways. It's just one of those things you can't do, I don't know if you've heard that, but it's true."

She sheepishly got back in her car and drove away. Then I felt momentary guilt for yelling at some random stranger. But then I felt justified. And then I blogged about it. And then I went to the bathroom. And then I ate a cheese sandwich. And then I watched some more cable TV obsessing on Reverend Loudmouth. And then I stopped.

UPCOMING STANDUP COMEDY APPEARANCES AND COMEDY AUDIO AT:

www.myspace.com/MacYapper

Thanks everybody who came out to Slapsticks Saturday night!

ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!
EMAIL me at johnmcintire@comcast.net